Saturday, August 6, 2011

I got 99 problems. But the Bitch ain't one. Literally!

Note : The content is relative to time and author's mood.
1. Vaidehi Keskar
- Do not disagree, she sings, "Triu tai, Triu tai daar ughad!" minimum thrice a day. THAT irritating.
2. Parents
- Giving pointless advice and expecting me to follow them without arguement.
3. People who ask, "Are you crazy/mad?. " - I am; Thodi thodi, universal answer.
+ People who ask, "Have you got nothing else to do?!" - Implicitly answered question.
+ People who ask, "Have you lost it?" - Firstly, teko kya? Secondly, 'it' kya? :P
4. The White saaay in my tea.
5. Fats and unhygene that accompanies the tastiest food. Always.
6. Kalyan train arriving at platform no. 1A
7. Those who do not laugh when they want to.
8. Travelling without ticket and saying, "Kissiko pata nahi chalega."
9. People who defend Dombivli.
10. Waiters who always say, "yeh nahi hai, khatam ho gaya, etc"
11. people who waste my time.
12. People who NEVER waste time.
13. Throwing away plastic paper/bags.
14. 'Gildroy Lockheart's.
15. Overacting.
16. Overreacting.
17. KDMT buses
18. Waiting for KDMT buses
19. People who force to have more food.
20. Copying the assignments. Not that copying is an issue, the worthlessness of writing the mastercopy is.
21. Pretense. Any kind.
22. People who are not open to changes.
23. Engineering books.
24. Rikshaw walas, Ticket vendors and bus conductors shouting for "Sutte paise"
25. Passport nikalneka procedure and every person involved in it.
26. Talking in angrezi where there's no need to.
27. Local madhlya bhandkudal or/and khadus aunties.
28. Missing a train.
29. Shyness about being clicked. Itna muh chipaneki kya jaroorat hai bhaai!
30. Spellchecks. Link toot jaati hai.
31. NOT knowing the phrase, 'agree to disagree.'
32. People who have hair in ears. Yucks!
33. Loud throat-crackers at restauant wash basins.
34. People who read while I write/type.
35. Unavailable network.
36. Loop roaming charges.
37. Geeks who attend lectures during massbunk.
38. over-'Monica'giri.
39. judgements.
40. Absolutely pointless criticism. Virodhasathi virodh kind.
41. Popatpanchi.
42. That Quant Sir in IMFS.
43. 'Dolorous Umbridge's.
44. Chatugiri.
45. Keeping quiet when you should speak.
46. Speaking when you should keep quiet.
47. Staring while I eat.
48. Typing fast and forcefully on MY laptop.
49. Doing "Tchk" and telling me to close the window when I'm enjoying the rains.
50. Chewing-gums.
51. Chewing words.
52. Chewing my mind.
53. Errors. Program errors.
54. Hanged Pc.
55. 204, IT centre, RAIT, Nerul.
56. Toilets, office staff, sweepers, khadus librarian @ RAIT
57. Mobile service centres.
58. Using sarcasm on 'show off' measures.
59. Believing what one should not.
60. NOT believing what one should.
61. Liking stuff, but not 'like'ing it.
62. Thinking that your life is worth being preserved and hidden at A51 or Room of Requirement.
63. Harpic advertisement at j1 time.
64. Calling someone angry when they're reacting for being hurt.
65. Compulsion. Of any kind.
66. People who have stood me up.
.... Err, they're not a problem as they don't matter really.
So,
66. Having to explain jokes.
67. Never talking nonsense.
68. Puranik sir. He made my parents make me stop my Dance classes. :|
69. Vegetables.
70. Having a problem with me. Not telling what it is, when I have no clue about it.
71. Laughing when there's no joke.
72. Laughing when you have no clue what the joke was.
73. Those who see THROUGH you (I am opaque.) in person but 'Hi!' over FB.
74. Salesmen/ Saleswomen.
75. Underestimating opponets.
76. Underestimating oneself.
77. Uncleaned nails.
78. Judging by someone's parents/hair/looks/body/voice. Nobody has a choice there.
79. Kalki Koechin.
80. Vidhate sir. I just don't know, I see him and my mind says, "Inspector Waghmare!"
81. Traffic.
82. Brand ambessedors, with absolutely no connection to the brand.
83. Curly hair.
84. Cleaning my room.
85. Finding it unclean again.
86. Head banging on a not-so-head-bangable song.
87. Expecting a msg from someone, and kisi aur ka hi msg aaye!
88. Misplaced Jokes, style, workoholicness, attitude.
89. No knowledge about any of the following:
Friends, HIMYM, the Simpsons, Two and a Half Men, PuLa, Mumbai-Pune-Mumbai, Prashant Damle, etc.
90. Professors, who do not appreciate creative answers. Naah.. all of 'em.
91. Wrong adresses/ numbers.
92. Unnecessary 'Sorry's and 'Thank You's.
93. Overrating success.
94. Drunken jackasses.
95. Doctors with specialisation. :/
96. Free advice.
97. Refill/lead khatam hona, when there are only 15 mins and 2 questions still left in the exam.
98. Daily-soaps.
99. my disobedient mind.

1 comment:

  1. lot many problems you have superwoman...shyaa

    Quant sir in IMFS... :D :D telling you not asking you :P :P

    ReplyDelete